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- TOP TEN MICHAEL JACKSON MARRIAGE TIPS
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- 10. Mickey Mouse ears make a great birth control device
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- 9. Be considerate -- try not to hog the monkey
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- 8. Keep the moonwalking crap to a minimum
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- 7. Apologize after saying something like "I wish I'd married the
- remains of the Elephant Man instead of you!"
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- 6. Whenever wife complains about how freakin' weird you are, show
- her a picture of Prince
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- 5. Make it clear that as far as she's concerned, your pants are
- "Neverland"
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- 4. Pretend not to notice when she flirts with other androgynous
- freaks
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- 3. Maintain joint account with Revlon
-
- 2. Keep having surgery until you and your wife are identical twins
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- 1. Two words: beat it!
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- Playout -- "Beat It" by Michael Jackson
- Letterman, June 14, 1995
- Copyright Worldwide Pants, Inc. 1995
-